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God is good and God is great. We don’t deserve anything from Him, nothing at all. We haven’t done Him a favour by saying “Jesus I accept you into my life”. What can we possibly do for Him that he can’t do for Himself? God certainly does not need us.

However, God is also personal. God is intimate. He loves with a fiery passion so great it shredded the power of death, completely ripping the enemy to pieces – all for you. He pursues the depths of our souls. He walks every step with us. Ever faithful, always there, through it all.


Isaiah 49:15-16

15 “Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you.

16 Behold, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are continually before me.


God pursues us relentlessly, but do we really pursue God? Do we truly seek Jesus, or do we seek an experience, favour, happiness? When life goes well and we feel God’s presence and hear His voice, we glorify Him and loudly proclaim “Jesus is so awesome! I love Him more than anything!” This is good. But then we move into a growth, testing, faith refining stage. Everything is suddenly difficult. We experience something unpleasant, uncomfortable, or maybe we just don’t feel God the way we usually do. In these times God watches us intently. These stages are our opportunities to show what God really means to us and not just say it. We pursue God, we seek earnestly, passionately, hungering after His heart. We fight for our faith, we endure with our hope and trust fully rooted in His word and His promise. Or at least that’s what we should do…

In my walk, I fall to pieces the moment God seems removed. Everything collapses and I just give up. I don’t know how to pursue Him, or perhaps I am not really willing. It just seems too hard when I have to fight for it. My faith deflates, and I just sit there and drown in apathy. I wait until God comes back to fetch me, to lift me from the drain and carry me again. Is this how it was meant to be?

God will never let you go. He hung on a tree, He died a tortuous death in utter darkness and agony, He endured it all – for you. He will pick you up by His mercy, His grace, and His earth shattering love. But will His face not fall and His eyes cloud with sadness? He commits and invests Himself so deeply, and we commit so feebly in return. This is not how it was meant to be.

When God seems distant (He is not) it is truly an opportunity to show our faith. Not the words, but the thrumming and all conquering faith that sets heaven roaring in triumph. Fight for it. Show God what He means to you. Glory to Jesus, in all things, always.



It has been a long time since the previous post, far too long. There has certainly been progress in my life. I have started to find people interesting. I find myself desperately curious about their stories. Who are they? Not the facade, but who are they at their cores? What weights do they carry? What parts of themselves have been torn away by the world? I have also been moved enough to be nice to people (sounds silly, but to me this is huge). I am not interested in the shallow, half-hearted compliments or token gestures – that never has and never will be me. However, when I think an awesome thought about someone, or I notice something epic in them, should I not voice it?

People rarely see Jesus in themselves the way others do. We believe the lies of the deceiver and we don’t know the impact we can have. There is glorious light in every Christian, not of themselves, but rather the uncontainable beauty of Jesus. That light is infectious, you let it out and it reflects off almost everything. The world is completely on its knees, crushed and bleeding in misery as the enemy runs rampant. The earth and its inhabitants are shattered and screaming in agony. Darkness suffocates them and laughs at their plight. But Jesus is the light. Jesus in you, Jesus in me. Let Him out.

I watched a short video of an old man, alone and lost in the world, his long past wife and unborn child in the ground. I don’t know how I came across the video, but after it was finished God asked me “Will you get stuck in?” I answered after a moment, and my answer is my own, but that question applies to every believer.

Will you bring the glory of Jesus to the broken, gently lift their faces and turn their eyes to the blazing passion of our Savior…

Glory to Jesus, forever and ever. Amen.

2 Responses to “Part 5: Pursuit”

  • Niel

    Ja!!! I’ve waited for this piece for quite a while =) Awesome! Love the way He is using you…

  • Tamsyn

    Your honesty is so refreshing, and I’ve been struck by how you perceive Him, how beautiful and real He is to you 🙂